What’s in a title?

A reflection on the past 75 days.

It was mid-September when we identified the date on which my successor would start at my place of employment. We decided that she would take over my roles effective on the date of our October board meeting, we would transition from mid-October to late December, and I would retire effective January 1. In addition, we had to develop a strategy to communicate the changes to my leadership team, to the departments reporting to me, to members of senior management, and more. While the recruitment process had taken months, its conclusion came together very quickly.

As we finalized the plans described above, there was some debate as to whether I would retain my titles until the end of the year or only until the October board meeting when my successor would officially join the members of senior management. I took a few days to think about this and, in the end, concluded it was best for me, my successor and the organization to have the changes, including staff reporting relationships, take effect in mid-October. I would become Executive Legal Advisor, a role which allowed me to provide counsel to my successor and our CEO, and which established clear roles and responsibilities between me and my successor until my retirement. But, my roles as chief legal officer and corporate secretary, which I had worked towards for my entire career and had held for the past nearly 10 years, would end in a mere three weeks. How did I feel about it?

As I stated in a prior blog, my mantra has been “I work to live, not the other way around.” Further, while I have identified with the job titles as reflective of my role, they have not defined how I work with people. I prefer to work collaboratively with people and have seldom had to use “position authority” to get things done. Individually these two approaches don’t mean much, but collectively the result was that perhaps I didn’t identify with the titles as much as someone who is in the “kicking and screaming” camp as defined by Smith in his book, Purposeful Retirement, described in an earlier blog. In addition, I have always known that I had several titles: son, husband, dad, brother, mentor, mentee, and so on.

I was not; I have been; I am not; I do not mind.

Epicurus

In his book “How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free,” Ernie Zelinski states that the mind has been destructive if “it has created a false identity that is solely associated with your career or job. This identity is false because it is nothing more than a fiction of the mind.” Zelinski goes on to state that “[y]ou must transcend your own mind and societal thinking to discover and get in touch with your true identity – or “essence” as some spiritual leaders call it.” It’s this getting in touch with my personal essence that led me to the book “Why Buddism is True: The Science and Philosophy of Meditation and Enlightenment” by Robert Wright. I’ll spend more time on this book in later blog entries. For now, let’s focus on Zelinski’s approach to finding your “essence.”

  • Start by imagining that work in the world was abolished. Write down what kind of person you would want to be in a non-work world. In addition, write down your 5 best traits. If you’re not sure where to start, ask someone who isn’t currently employed how they describe themselves.
  • Look at it, read it. Again and again. Tweak it if you must. After you’ve done this, you should realize that your true self is based on the experience of being human, and the joy and peace of mind that accompany the experience of being human.
  • And what does it mean to “be human?” Your true self is not based on some superficial identity, work-related or otherwise. Your true self is based on more profound things, such as your creativity, kindness, passionate pursuits, generosity, love, joy, spontaneity, connectedness to others, sense of humor, peace of mind, inner happiness, and spirituality.

Given all the opportunity that retirement offers for you to be your true self and become much more than you have ever been, there is no need to hang onto a work identity.

Ernie Zelinski, “How to Retire, Happy, Wild and Free.”

But what if you still want a title? While I don’t think a simple phrase will every truly define you, maybe you don’t want to simply be called a “retiree.” What would you like to be called? Have fun with it. Zelinsky gives a couple of options, including “Connoisseur of Leisure” and “Connoisseur of Life.” He goes on to provide the following talking points when you’re asked about your new title.

I am now a Connoisseur of Life. I am too prosperous to work
long and hard hours. I have earned my prosperity and deserve
the right to enjoy a creative and satisfying lifestyle. I am too spiritually
evolved to have an identity based on my work, possessions,
and net worth. Instead, my identity is based on more profound things,
including my creativity, my generosity, my spontaneity, my sense of humor,
my peace of mind, my passion for new experiences,
my happiness, and my spirituality.

I hope you find this exercise as freeing and productive as I did. Until next time, Happy Holidays!